I'm not entirely sure but I think I fell in love with someone's girlfriend last week...
- "I'm voting for Donald Trump b/c I've never seen a president get assassinated..."
- While I'm kickin it with somebody, I'll send some soft shit of me and her to my story so when she looks at it she wants to fwm again, (then I delete it when she leaves)
- I got too lit and missed the Meek Mill Dreams & Nightmares Intro drop one night and was mad at myself for like 3 weeks but more on that later...
- me & a bunch of other graduate students got addicted to dice last weekend
- if the NBA was street ball niggas would have stomped Steph Curry's yellow ass out a long time ago
- if you go out for sushi wit ya new bae and you see ya old bae lookin at y'all from the bar you just gotta order all the expensive rolls and laugh extra hard at all ya date's jokes
- I was listening to a mash-up of Love Yourself and Hello when I realized that I love music more than I love any animal and most people
- if I ever offend you just let me know and I'll pretend to give a fuck
- something special is going on here.....
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Nothing's been the same for Future since he woke up in a new Bugatti. Nothing's been the same for the Delaware music scene since Love the Universe was released. Nothing's been the same for Cypher Clique since that Firefly stage.
Things are starting to move fast. But the biggest difference I notice is the way people are acting around me. I've changed a little, but for the most part I'mm still the same person who used to freestyle battle in the Caesar Rodney hallways in between class. Still haven't found a need for a girlfriend. And I still offer the best advice for those of you perusing the single scene. Which brings me to the topic of this next blog post:
STILL not a player (story time)
I had a very weird experience a couple weeks ago (swear y'all never fail to make me nervous when I step out). I went to a familiar bar near my condo and see a female friend standing near the door so I approach. First thing she says:
"Hey Erich, are you still hooking up with ________ ."
"Nah, it started to get weird. I think she dates some mexican soccer player now."
"Yeah she is, he's pretty cool. I was just wondering.."
Awkward moment #1 :
I think to myself,
'Why would I still be hooking up with her if you know she has a boyfriend?'.. unless...
Just then, a group of 4 women and 1 Guy walks in. They all work at the same bar down the street. I know everyone but the Guy.
"Hey Erich!" I hear as one runs over and gives me a hug. The rest follow suit and now we're standing in a big circle. One girl in particular (we'll call her Rosie) makes it a priority to ignore me until the lone Guy breaks away to fetch drink orders.
Awkward moment #2:
"Erich, you're a whore," Rosie speaks out.
"Whoa, whoa, what makes you say that?"
Another girl in the circle speaks up, "because you and Rosie were together for like 3 months when you first moved here, THEN you hung out with me the other day."
"We were never together."
"You know what she means," Rosie snaps back.
"I didn't know you two worked together tho."
"Well -," Rosie starts before the guy comes back with an arm full of drinks. She gave me the We'll Continue This Later face.
[Later...]
We're still in the same circle and some girls I went to high school with walked up. There's 7 of us now; Rosie, her co-workers, my 2 HS friends, and this other random guy with a beard who kept popping in and out of our conversations (we'll call him Dave). This is when awkward moment #3 happens.
Awkward moment #3:
Dave approaches me and whispers, "Yo broooo, do you know that girl from high school, she's pretty hot. you should give her my number."
I'm thinking to myself 'why don't you get her number yourself... while you're here... now', and suddenly as I'm in mid thought, the guys blurts out to the crowd.
"Erich, now I know where I remember you from! FIREFLY." Dave, don't be that guy.
"Oh from the Cypher Clique performance?" I respond politely. I can be polite sometimes.
"No, no, no," he says even louder than the first time, making sure he has everyone's attention. "You were hooking up with my ex-girlfriend that weekend..."
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That whole night bothers me. For a lot of reasons, but I narrowed them down to 3:
1- Stop assuming I'm tryna ruin people's relationships. I just wanna make really good music.
Okay, so I haven't been in a relationship since January 11th, 2009. I understand that. But that doesn't mean I'm becoming a progressively worse person. I'm not very attractive. I don't live for more female attention. I stopped saving numbers in my phone months ago. I get it. But I also don't talk to anyone on a daily basis except for my best friends and business partners. So for you to assume I'm trying to fuck your girlfriend is completely wrong of you my friend..... well, kind of..
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2- If you're afraid to spark a conversation with someone you don't know, you don't deserve her.
A couple of blogs ago I taught you scum lords how to win over the girl of your dreams and a lot of you still haven't caught on. It's bad enough that I live at a coastal beach in the off season ( = there's like 300 people who live in this town until summer hits/ everyone knows everything about everyone else), so if you see someone you don't know, there's a good chance she's new here. Take advantage of this opportunity. Don't sit back and watch her walk away forever. Me? I'm good. Late night I just wanna get drunk, write songs, and FaceTime other dude's girlfri.... eh, uhm.. never mind..
__
3- Dry snitching on me in front of other women isn't gonna make them wanna fuck with you.
First let me explain dry snitching:
Some random fuckboy in a high school class says loud enough for the teacher to hear - "Man, it really smells like weed in here. That smell sure is strong."
Don't do that bruh. Don't be that guy. Let me live and I'll let you live. I had no idea she was your ex-girlfriend until you made that information available to everyone. Furthermore, I have no idea who you are. Double whammy. Honestly, I was just being nice allowing you to chill with us. I didn't use to be that nice. Don't try to ruin it for me. Because chances are, I'm gonna run into your current girlfriend at some point and I'm gonna remember this conversation we had...
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OH by the way..
Cypher Clique just released a song called "The Tennis Team". It's very new and very good. There are links to the song throughout this entire blog if it hasn't occurred to you already. You should listen to it. You should play it for your family and your friends. You should post snippets of it to snapchat and Instagram. You should tag me in it on Twitter. But most importantly.... you should introduce it to your girlfriend.
...
It took me much longer than most to realize that our bodies are never perfect, so instead of me posting a gym pic, I'm a just leave this here and ask you to tune into Cypher Clique's latest project and short story, The District, made by a few guys who love all of your bodies...
